Potential Bipolar/borderline?
Question by Coco: potential bipolar/borderline?
I’m concerned that I have bipolar or borderline personality disorder – I know they’re quite different conditions, bear with me.
I’ve had extremely low self esteem for over six years, and throughout that time have dieted intensely and purged frequently, then gone through periods of binging and not caring about my weight. I get badly anxious for a couple of weeks at a time, then it’ll go away for a week or so. Sometimes I just get intense anxiety for a day, and then it’ll go away. I’m afraid of being abandoned and freak out when I think someone’s leaving me, but then I get periods when I have a lot more confidence and think I could be alright on my own. I’ve self-harmed for six years, but I go through periods where I stop for a month or so. I’ve had suicidal periods and periods of being depressed on an off, and these seem to alternate with periods when I feel positive and make lots of plans. Also, when I’m in a positive mood I often take drugs and drink a fair bit – but when I’m down I don’t want to do anything, not talk to anyone, let alone do drugs or drink or party. If I do want to when I’m down, it’s with a self-harming intent. Also, when I’m depressed I sleep about twice as much as I do when I feel good.
I know this is really really terribly rambly and probably doesn’t make much sense and I’m sorry. I’m 17, if that helps. I’ve tried to calm my anxiety, stop my self-harm, stop dieting – just calm myself down in general – when I’m feeling positive, but it doesn’t help. I’ve done online tests for both bipolar and borderline personality disorder, and am considering seeing a doctor but I really would like some opinions first. I’m not sure if there’s anything legitimately wrong with me or if I’m just sooky and don’t know how to be an adult.
Thanks for any tips, advice, anything at all. I’m not really looking for a definite diagnosis, just for someone to tell me if there’s anything to diagnose at all.
Best answer:
Answer by whatever
Visit your doctor.
It sounds like bipolar but your abandonment issues don’t necessarily pertain to borderline.
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